The Mayonnaise Jar

The Mayonnaise Jar

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day is not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and two cups of ...coffee.

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him.

When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and fills it with golf balls.

He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured it into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else.

He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous "YES".

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

"Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things - God, family,
children, health, friends, and favorite passions. Things, that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the things that matter like your job, house, and car. The sand is everything else -- the small stuff." he said.

"If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "There is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are
important to you..." he told them.

"So... pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Worship with your family. Play with your children. Take your partner out to dinner. Spend time with good friends. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the dripping tap. Take care of the golf balls first -- the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented.

The professor smiled and said, "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend."

Life Lessons

Lesson 1: Naked Wife

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says, "I'll give you $800 to drop that towel." After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob.

After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 dollars and leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks,…

"Who was that?" "It was Bob the next door neighbor," she replies. "Great!" the husband says, "Did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?"

Moral of the story:
If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure.

Lesson 2

A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out. The Genie says, "I'll give each of you just one wish" "Me first! Me first!" says the administration clerk. "I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world." Poof! She's gone. "Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in Hawaii,relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life." Poof! He's gone. "OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, "I want those two back in the office after lunch."

Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.

Lesson 3

A priest offered a lift to a Nun. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said,"Father, remember Psalm 129?" The priest removed his hand. But,changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?" The priest apologized "Sorry sister but the flesh is weak." Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way. On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, "Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory."

Moral of the story: If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great opportunity.

Lesson 4

A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A rabbit asked him,"Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?" The crow answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested.

A fox jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very high up.

Lesson 5: Power of Charisma

A turkey was chatting with a bull "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, but I haven't got the energy." "Well, why don't you nibble on my droppings?" replied the bull. "They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.

Moral of the story: Bullshit might get you to the top, but it wont keep you there.

Lesson 6

A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.

Moral of the story:
1. Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy
2. Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend
3. And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!

Past is your Best Teacher

BILL GATES in a restaurant.
After eating, he gave 5$ to the waiter as a tip. The... waiter had a strange feeling on his face after the tip.
Gates realized & asked.What happened?
Waiter: I'm just amazed Bcoz on the same table ur son gave Tip Of... 500$...
& u his Father, richest man in the world Only Gave 5$...?
Gates Smiled & Replied With Meaningful words:
"He is Son of the world's richest man, but i am the son of a wood cutter..."

( Never Forget Your Past. It's Your Best Teacher. )

World's most famous Photograph

 

Afghan Girl [1984]

And of course the afghan girl, picture shot by National Geographic photographer Steve McCurry. Sharbat Gula was one of the students in an informal school within the refugee camp; McCurry, rarely given the opportunity to photograph Afghan women, seized the opportunity and captured her image. She was approximately 12 years old at the time. She made it on the cover of National Geographic next year, and her identity was discovered in 1992.
Photographer: Steve McCurry


Omayra Sánchez [1985]

Omayra Sánchez was one of the 25,000 victims of the Nevado del Ruiz (Colombia) volcano which erupted on November 14, 1985. The 13-year old had been trapped in water and concrete for 3 days. The picture was taken shortly before she died and it caused controversy due to the photographer's work and the Colombian government's inaction in the midst of the tragedy, when it was published worldwide after the young girl's death.
Photographer: Frank Fournier


Portrait of Winston Churchill [1941]

This photograph was taken by Yousuf Karsh, a Canadian photographer, when Winston Churchill came to Ottawa. The portrait of Churchill brought Karsh international fame. It is claimed to be the most reproduced photographic portrait in history. It also appeared on the cover of Life magazine.
Photograph from: Yousuf Karsh


The plight of Kosovo refugees [1999]

The photo is part of The Washington Post's Pulitzer Prize-winning entry (2000) showing how a Kosovar refugee Agim Shala, 2, is passed through a barbed wire fence into the hands of grandparents at a camp run by United Arab Emirates in Kukes, Albania. The members of the Shala family were reunited here after fleeing the conflict in Kosovo.
Photographer: Carol Guzy


Stricken child crawling towards a food camp [1994]

The photo is the "Pulitzer Prize" winning photo taken in 1994 during the Sudan Famine. The picture depicts stricken child crawling towards an United Nations food camp, located a kilometer away. The vulture is waiting for the child to die so that it can eat him. This picture shocked the whole world. No one knows what happened to the child, including the photographer Kevin Carter who Left the place as soon as the photograph was taken. Three months later he committed suicide due to depression.
Photographer: Kevin Carter


Segregated Water Fountains [1950]

Picture of segregated water fountains in North Carolina taken by Elliott Erwitt.
Photographer: Elliott Erwitt, Magnum Photos


Burning Monk - The Self-Immolation [1963]

June 11, 1963, Thich Quang Duc, a Buddhist monk from Vietnam, burned himself to death at a busy intersection in downtown Saigon to bring attention to the repressive policies of the Catholic Diem regime that controlled the South Vietnamese government at the time. Buddhist monks asked the regime to lift its ban on flying the traditional Buddhist flag, to grant Buddhism the same rights as Catholicism, to stop detaining Buddhists and to give Buddhist monks and nuns the right to practice and spread their religion. While burning Thich Quang Duc never moved a muscle.
Photographer: Malcolm Browne


Bliss [2000]

Bliss is the name of a photograph of a landscape in Napa County, California, east of Sonoma Valley. It contains rolling green hills and a blue sky with stratocumulus and cirrus clouds. The image is used as the default computer wallpaper for the "Luna" theme in Windows XP. The photograph was taken by the professional photographer Charles O'Rear, a resident of St. Helena in Napa County, for digital-design company HighTurn. O'Rear has also taken photographs of Napa Valley for the May 1979 National Geographic Magazine article Napa, Valley of the Vine. O'Rear's photograph inspired Windows XP's US$ 200 million advertising campaign Yes you can.
Photographer: Charles O'Rear


The Triangle Shirtwaist Fire [1911]

Picture of bodies at the Triangle Shirtwaist Company. Company rules were to keep doors closed to the factory so workers (mostly immigrant women) couldn't leave or steal. When a fire ignited, disaster struck. 146 people died that day.
Photographer: International Ladies Garmet workers Union


Portrait of Karl Marx - The Father of Communism

Why We Shout In Anger

"Why We Shout In Anger"

A Hindu saint who was visiting river Ganges to take ba...th found a group of family members on the banks, shouting in anger at each other. He turned to his disciples smiled and asked.

'Why do people shout in anger shout at each other?'

Disciples thought for a while, one of them said, 'Because we lose our calm, we shout.'

'But, why should you shout when the other person is just next to you? You can as well tell him what you have to say in a soft manner.' asked the saint

Disciples gave some other answers but none satisfied the other disciples.
Finally the saint explained, .

'When two people are angry at each other, their hearts distance a lot. To cover that distance they must shout to be able to hear each other. The angrier they are, the stronger they will have to shout to hear each other to cover that great distance.

What happens when two people fall in love? They don't shout at each other but talk softly, Because their hearts are very close. The distance between them is either nonexistent or very small...'

The saint continued, 'When they love each other even more, what happens? They do not speak, only whisper and they get even closer to each other in their love. Finally they even need not whisper, they only look at each other and that's all. That is how close two people are when they love each other.'

He looked at his disciples and said.

'So when you argue do not let your hearts get distant, Do not say words that distance each other more, Or else there will come a day when the distance is so great that you will not find the path to return.'

Do Men Remember Anniversaries?

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A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in their bed. She puts on her dressing gown and goes downstairs to look for him. She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a hot cup of coffee in front of him. He appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall. She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of his coffee. 'What's the matter, dear?' she whispers as she steps into the room, 'Why are you down here at this time of night?' The husband looks up from his coffee, 'I am just remembering when we first met 20 years ago and started dating. You were only 16. Do you remember back then?' he says solemnly. The wife is touched to tears thinking that her husband is so caring, so sensitive. 'Yes, I do' she replies. The husband pauses. The words were not coming easily. 'Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car?' 'Yes, I remember!' said the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him. The husband continues. 'Do you remember when he shoved the shotgun in my face and said, 'Either you marry my daughter, or I will send you to jail for 20 years?' 'I remember that too' she replies softly. He wipes another tear from his cheek and says, 'Had I gone with second option, I would have been released today.'

 

Where Heaven Touches The Earth

 

 

Where Heaven Touches The Earth

The beauty of untouched nature and the freshness of mountain peaks with white flourishes, are subject of photos done by Andrey Gontarev. This paradise for birds and mountain goats, rare and unique plants, is a challenge for many fans of beautiful view through the eye of the camera.

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Amazing

STUDENT WHO OBTAINED 0% IN AN EXAM, BUT HE DIDNT ANSWER ANY QUESTION WRONG!!

 

Q1. In which battle did Napoleon die?

Ans: his last battle

 

Q2. Where was the Declaration of independence signed?

Ans: At the bottom of the page

 

Q3. River Ravi flows in which state?

ans: Liquid

 

Q4. What is the main reason for divorce?

ans: ...Marriage 

 

Q5. What is the main reason for Failure?

ans:Exams 

 

Q6. What can you never eat for breakfast?

ans: Lunch and Dinner 

 

Q7. What looks like Half an Apple?

ans: the other Half. 

 

Q8. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become?

ans: It will simply become wet 

 

Q9. How can a man go eight days without sleeping?

ans: No problem, he sleeps at night. 

 

Q10.How can you lift an elephant with one hand?

ans:You will Never find an elephant that has only one hand... 

 

Q11. If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four apples and three Oranges in other hand, what would you have?

Ans: Very large hands. 

 

Q12. If it took eight men ten hours to build a wall, how long would it take four men to build it?

ans: No time at all, the wall is already built. 

 

Q13. How can you drop a raw egg onto a conrete floor without cracking it?

ans: Any way you want, concrete floors are very hard to crack. 

 

HEARD AFTER READING THIS, EXAMINER FAINTED!!

Nice story

A turtle family decided to go on a picnic.

Turtles, being naturally slow about things, took seven years to preparefor their outing.

 

Finally the turtle family left home looking for a suitableplace. Duringthe second year of their journey they found a place ideal for them at last!For about six months they cleaned the area, unpacked the picnic basket,and completed the arrangements. Then they discovered they had forgottenthe salt.

 

A picnic without salt would be a disaster, they all agreed.

 

Aftera lengthy discussion, the youngest turtle was chosen to retrieve the saltfrom home. Although he was the fastest of the slow moving turtles, thelittle turtle whined, cried, and wobbled in his shell. He agreed to goon one condition: that no one would eat until he returned. The family consentedand the little turtle left.

 

 

Three years passed and the little turtle hadnot returned. Five years... six years...then on the seventh year of hisabsence, the oldest turtle could no longer contain his hunger.

 

 

He announcedthat he was going to eat and begun to unwrap a sandwich. At that pointthe little turtle suddenly popped out from behind a tree shouting, "See!I knew you wouldn't wait. Now I am not going to go get the salt."

The Original Country

    

 

 

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This is a list of the most original of which are specific for its natural beauty, some demographic characteristics, and some of the tourist features. A country with 3 million lakes - Canada In Canada, there are more than 60 percent of lakes in the world, they are so numerous that their exact number is unknown. In some regions,for every 100 square meters. km for more than 30 lakes. The country in which more than 17,500 islands - Indonesia Indonesia consists of more than 17 500 islands with a total coastline of 81,350 km. Approximately 6,000 of the islands are inhabited. The largest islands - Java, Sumatra, Borneo, Sulawesi, Bali, Lombok and Flores. Indonesia contains 10-15 per cent of coral reefs in the world. Country Desert - Libya Libya - a country with the highest percentage of the Desert (99%). Libyan Desert, which covers most of Libya, is one of the driest places on Earth. In some areas can go decades without rain, and even in the high rainfall are rare, once in 5-10 years. The country with the lowest population densities - Mongolia The country with the lowest population density in the world is Mongolia, population density, about 4.4 people per square mile (1.7 pers. / Km). In Mongolia, the 2.5 million people occupy more than 600,000 square miles of land. Most of this population lives in urban areas as the development in the vast deserts of Mongolia grassland is difficult, particularly because of the drought and dust storms, resulting in some parts of the country almost as well as desert and in time of Genghis Khan. Country in the jungle - Suriname The forest area is 14.8 million hectares (57 000 square miles), representing 91% of the total land area of Suriname (16.3 million hectares, or 63 000 square miles). The extensive forest of Suriname and the low population, about 400 thousand in the capital and coastal cities, give him one of the lowest rates of deforestation in the world. Only 5 percent of the population lives in tropical forests, it is indigenoustribes and six blacks - descendants of runaway slaves who recreated forest communities centuries ago and today retain their traditional West African style. Dying is the country - Ukraine Country with the highest fertility decline is Ukraine, with the natural population decline 0.8% each year. Ukraine is expected to lose 28% of its population in 2050 (from 46.8 million today to 33.4 million in 2050). The country below sea level - the Netherlands Half of the Netherlands lies below sea level. Live below sea level to more than 60 percent of the population of 15.8 million. Only in the area south of the Netherlands increased to 30 yards or more. The most unfrequented country - Tuvalu This is one of the smallest countries in the world. Tuvalu is located halfway between Australia and Hawaii, and is projected to be the first country to disappear under water when global warming will raise sea levels high enough. In addition, here it is very difficult and very expensive to get flights out of Fiji. Tuvalu visited a total of 1,100 tourists a year. Country-continent - Australia Australia is the only country in the world, which embraces the whole continent, in any other continent has more than one country. This is the only country which is a continent and a continent which is the country. This is the sixth largest country in the world, with a total area of 7686850 sq km (2967909 sq. miles), it is a little less than 48 U.S. states and in 31.5 times more than the United Kingdom.

 

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Customer Care in 2020 (funny)

    

 

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Operator: Hello Pizza Hut! Customer: Hello, can you please take my order? Operator : Can I have your multi purpose card number first, Sir? Customer: Yeah! Hold on..... My number is 889861356102049998-45-54610 Operator : OK... you're... Mr Singh and you're calling from 17 Jalan Kayu. Your home number is 4094! 2366, your office 76452302 and your mobile is 0142662566. You are calling from you home number now. Customer: (Astronished) How did you get all my phone numbers? Operator : We are connected to the system, Sir. Customer: May I order your Seafood Pizza... Operator : That's not a good idea Sir. Customer: How come? Operator : According to your medical records, you have high blood pressure and even higher cholesterol level, sir. Customer: What?... What do you recommend then? Operator : Try our Low Fat Hokkien Mee Pizza. You'll like it. Customer: How do you know for sure? Operator : You borrowed a book entitled 'Popular Hokkien Dishes' from the National Library last week, sir. Customer: OK I give up... Give me three family size ones then. Operator : That should be enough for your family of 10, Sir. The total is Rs. 2,450. Customer: Can I pay by! credit card? Operator : I'm afraid you have to pay us cash, Sir. Your credit card is over the limit and you owe your bank $1,51,758 since October last year. That's not including the late payment charges on your housing loan, Sir. Customer: I guess I have to run to the neighbourhood ATM and withdraw some cash before your guy arrives. Operator : You can't Sir. Based on the records, you've even your overdraft limit. Customer: Never mind just send the pizzas, I'll have the cash ready. How long is it gonna take anyway? Operator : About 45 minutes Sir, but if you can't wait you can always come and collect it on your motorcycle. Customer: What? Operator : According to the details in system ,you own a motorcycle registration number 1123. Customer: " ????" (hmmm.. these guys know my motorcyle number too!) Operator : Is there anything else, sir? Customer: Nothing.! .. by the way... aren't you giving me that 3 free bottles of cola as advertised? Operator : We normally would sir, but based on your records you're also diabetic... In the best interest of your health, we are holding this offer for you. Customer: (now pissed) ***%&$%%### You $##$%%@!))) Operator: Better watch your language sir. Remember on 15th July 2007 you were imprisoned for 2 months and fined Rs.5,000 for using abusive language against a policeman...? Customer: Faints...

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Unanswered Questions

 

 

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If all the nations in the world are in debt (am not joking. even US has got debts), where did all the money go? (weird) When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it? (to be given a thought) What is the speed of darkness? (absurd) If the black box flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole airplane made out of that stuff? (very good thinking) Who copyrighted the copyright symbol? (who knows) Can you cry under water? (let me try) Why do people say, "you've been working like a dog" when dogs just sit around all day? (did they mean something else) Why are the numbers on a calculator and a phone reversed? (God knows) Do fish ever get thirsty? (let me ask and tell) Can you get cornered in a round room? (by ones eyes) Why do birds not fall out of trees when they sleep? (tonight i will stay and watch) What came first, the fruit or the color orange? (seed) If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from? (No comments) What should one call a male ladybird? (No comments) If a person suffered from amnesia and then was cured would they remember that they forgot? (can somebody help) Can you blow a balloon up under water? (yes u can) Why is it called a 'building' when it is already built? (strange isn't it) If you were traveling at the speed of sound and you turned on your radio would you be able to hear it? (got to think scientifically) If you're traveling at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on, what happens? (i don't have a chance to try) Why is it called a TV set when there is only one? (very nice) If a person owns a piece of land do they own it all the way down to the core of the earth? (this is nice) Why do most cars have speedometers that go up to at least 130 when you legally can't go that fast on any road? (stupid, break the law)

  

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Why I fired my Secratary

This is a true story. Last week was my 40th birthday and I really didn't feel like waking up that morning. I managed to pull myself together and go downstairs for breakfast, hoping my wife would be pleasant and say, "Happy Birthday!", and possibly have a small present for me.

 

As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone "Happy Birthday." I thought… Well, that's marriage for you, but the kids… They will remember.

 

My kids came trampling down the stairs to breakfast, ate their breakfast, and didn't say a word to me. So when I made it out of the house and started for work, I felt pretty dumpy and despondent.

 

As I walked into my office, my secretary Joanne said, "Good Morning Boss, and by the way Happy Birthday!"

It felt a bit better knowing that at least someone remembered.

 

I worked in a zombie like fashion until about one o'clock, when Joanne knocked on my door and said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day outside, and it's your Birthday, why don't we go out for lunch, just you and me."

 

I said, "Thanks, Joanne, that's the best thing I've heard all day. Let's go!"

We went to lunch but not where we'd normally go. Instead she took me to a quiet bistro with a private table.

 

We had a couple of mixed drinks and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.

 

On the way back to the office, Joanne said, "You know, It's such a beautiful day… We don't have to go right back to the office, do we?"

 

I replied with "I suppose not. What do you have in mind?" She said, "Let's go to my apartment, it's just around the corner."

 

After arriving at her apartment, Joanne turned to me and said, "Boss if you don't mind, I'm goinna to step into the bedroom for just a moment. I'll be right back."

 

"Ok." I nervously replied.

 

 

She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake…

Followed by my wife, my kids, and dozens of my friends, and co-workers, all singing "Happy Birthday".

 

 

And I just sat there…

On the couch… Naked.

A young boy walks into a barber shop

A young boy walks into a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you."

 

The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, son?"

 

The boy takes the quarters and leaves.

 

"What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!"

Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store.

 

"Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?"

.

.

.

.

..

 

The boy licked his cone and replied, "Because the day I take the dollar, the game is over!"

When Engineers go to hell

An engineer dies and reports to the Pearly Gates.

Saint Peter checks his dossier and, not seeing his name there, accidentally sends him to Hell.

 

It doesn't take long before the engineer becomes rather dissatisfied with the level of comfort in Hell. He soon begins to design and build improvements. Shortly thereafter, Hell has air conditioning, flush toilets and escalators. Needless to say, the engineer is a pretty popular guy.

 

 

One day, God calls Satan and says with a sneer: "So, how are things in Hell?"

 

Satan replies: "Hey, things are going great. We've got air conditioning, flush toilets, and escalators. And there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next." "What!" God exclaims: "You've got an engineer? That's a mistake — he should never have been sent to Hell… send him to me."

 

"Not a chance," Satan replies: "I like having an engineer on the staff, and I'm keeping him!"

 

God insists: "Send him back or I'll sue."

 

Satan laughs uproariously and answers: "Yeah, right. And where are you going to get a lawyer?"

Management Lesson (very funny)

A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and she fell to the ground into a large field.

While she was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on her.

As the frozen bird laid there in the pile of cow dung, she began to realize how warm it was.

The dung was actually thawing her out!

She lays there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.

A passing cat hears the bird singing and comes to investigate.

Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug her out and ate her.

Morals of the story:
[1] Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.
[2] Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
[3] And when you are in deep shit, keep your mouth shut!