ULTIMATE TRUTH

>Ultimate truth
>( Uncanny-but true !)  

>Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock.  
>
>To Err is human, to forgive is not a COMPANY policy.
>  
>The road to success??.. Is always under construction.
>  
>Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but if you think again, neither does Milk.
>
>In order to get a Loan, you first need to prove that you don't need it.
>
>All the desirable things in life are either illegal, expensive or fattening.
>  
>Since Light travels faster than Sound, people appear brighter before you hear them speak.
>
>Everyone has a scheme of getting rich?.. Which never works.
>  
>If at first you don't succeed?. Destroy all evidence that you ever tried.
>
>You can never determine which side of the bread to butter. If it falls down, it will always land on the buttered side.
>
>Anything dropped on the floor will roll over to the most inaccessible corner.
>
>As soon as you mention something?? if it is good, it is taken?. If it is bad, it happens.
>  
>He who has the gold, makes the rules ---- Murphy's golden rule.
>
>If you come early, the bus is late. If you come late?? the bus is still late.
>  
>Once you have bought something, you will find the same item being sold somewhere else at a cheaper rate.
>  
>When in a queue, the other line always moves faster and the person in front of you will always have the most complex of transactions.
>
>If you have paper, you don't have a pen??. If you have a pen, you don't have paper?? if you have both, no one calls.
>  
>Especially for engg. Students----
>If you have bunked the class, the professor has taken attendance.
>
>You will pick up maximum wrong numbers when on roaming.
>
>The door bell or your mobile will always ring when you are in the bathroom.
>  
>After a long wait for bus no.20, two 20 number buses will always pull in together and the bus which you get in will be crowded than the other.
>
>If your exam is tomorrow, there will be a power cut tonight.

>Irrespective of the direction of the wind, the smoke from the cigarette will always tend to go to the non-smoker
 

An absolutely Brilliant Joke, ENJOYYYYYYYYYY!!!

An absolutely Brilliant Joke, ENJOYYYYYYYYYY!!!


A Woman was out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the woods.
She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap.

The frog said to her, "If you release me from this trap, I will grant
you three wishes."
The woman freed the frog, and the frog said, "Thank you, but I failed to
mention that there was a condition to your wishes.
Whatever you wish for, your husband will get times ten!" The woman said,
"That's okay."

For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the
world.
The frog warned her, "You do realize that this wish will also make your
husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis whom women will
flock to".
The woman replied, "That's okay, because I will be the most beautiful
Woman and he will have eyes only for me."
So, KAZAM-she's the most beautiful Woman in the world!
For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world.
The frog said, "That will make your husband the richest man in the
world. And he will be ten times richer than you. "
The woman said, "That's okay, because what's mine is his and what's his
is mine."
So, KAZAM-she's the richest woman in the world!

The frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered, "I'd like
a mild heart attack."

Moral of the story: Women are clever. Don't mess with them.

Attention female readers:
This is the end of the joke for you. Stop here and continue feeling
good.

Male readers: Please scroll down.


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The man had a heart attack ten times "milder" than his wife!!!

Moral of the story: Women are really dumb but think they're really
smart.

Let them continue to think that way and just enjoy the show

PS: If you are a woman and are still reading this; it only goes to show
that women never listen!!!

Forward this to all the guys for a good laugh, and to all the ladies who
have a go
316A